Your Nervous System Aligned to the Beyond

Q: As I sit here, I feel like I’m on a boat alone and the water is still and there’s no wind. I’m standing at the front of the boat, and I know that I’m waiting for something, and yet I don’t know what. When I woke up this morning, the words that came to me were ‘bring it on.’ What brought me to the chair was my daughter, the purity in her heart. I want to ask you to show me what needs cleaning in me.

John: If your personal life has a position of prominence, you won’t have a horizon, within, that is beyond your own life. As you stand in the front of the boat looking far out, have a horizon within that goes well beyond the one you see as a person.

That gives you full presence in this world with you clearly not being a ‘world-ling.’ You do everything that you need to do in your life, not because of the self you have, but because of what you know that is so far beyond your self. Your connection to that as awareness is what you use to position your self. You position your self in what you know is beyond, while the development of your self in this world continues.

As you live knowing and seeing from within a much greater horizon than what you can perceive as a person, your eyes will change, revealing a much deeper inner substance. It’s your real presence beyond anything that can affect your self, and it is what guides your self. You’ll always know the darkness that’s beyond the light you see, and you live reading it. It’s that depth of knowing that you’re anchored in. It’s what has your life.

For you, what I come from you know you’re going to.

 

……………………… Second Questioner…………………………

 

Q: John, it felt like a every single word you just spoke landed in me very clearly.

John: It’s where you’re going.

Q: I knew that was true for me, as well. I’ve been seeing that everything I’m in is really a relationship to knowing. A couple of years ago, you said, ‘perfecting belief. Suffering no distraction. Enabling entrance. Love to us.’ And the other day I thought, ‘that’s really all I’m doing here. I’m perfecting belief in what I know. It’s so intricate and there are so many dimensions to it. Sometimes when I connect with somebody, there’s this feeling that we’ve already died. We can be talking about things we’re knowing and seeing, but in the connection it feels like everything is known between us and there’s nothing to do in it.

John: You have taken personal inventory and laid it down to what you know, which has set your sight to a different horizon. It’s changed how and why you think. That different seeing has raised your mind to a level higher than your self. That mind is becoming the source of your personal perspective.

Q: It’s a different aspect or dimension of knowing. I realized that something changed for me. I realized that nothing is ever too much for me. I feel a presence in me. It’s not just a concept. It’s different. It’s not just knowing something. I would love if you could clarify for me how those two are connected, that sense of the beyond and knowing that there’s nothing to do in that at all.

John: You became what you knew in what was beyond your self, and you became staid in it. It gives you presence in relationship to what you know is beyond, enabling you as awareness to not just know and see into the beyond, but also to carry its weight, and there are more such points that you’re able to come into.

Q: That sense of never too much, would that be like a point from the beyond?

John: Your self in all of its conditioning and your past, together with this whole world, isn’t too much, and what you’re stepping into of the beyond is also not too much. As you are staid in that, the truth of it isn’t just known by you, it becomes realized in your body.

Q: It’s a response of the nervous system.

John: (Nods) It’s where your nervous system is aligned to your being and to the beyond. That presence that you’ve come into is your embodiment of the truth, within, that you’ve not only responded to, but given over to. It’s becoming embodied, that which you know you are of, despite the self and world that you’re in.

Q: It creates an unusual relationship with this world.

John: It gives you the power of freedom beyond what this world can comprehend. It’s what gives you a higher level of mobility in this world.

As you become its future by virtue of this presence, you are being its end, its answer.

Q: Is it that being staid in one of those points is what brings that to all the other points? I sense that these points are all connected.

John: For you to function as this presence, you’ll need to come into the other points.

Q: In the meeting that you had with last week, when I was coming into it, you were immediately in me and what was more important was my knowing within that. It didn’t matter if the experience left, and there was no lack. What does it take to be staid in that completely?

John: Being into it gone.

Q: When you said that, it was like the knowing came up and it’s like going into the beyond of this world, into the beyond of any experience or condition. The knowing goes beyond.

John: Into that, you were gone, and there you were staid in it, and without the use of effort you perfected your belief while you were in.

Q: That place I was describing in connecting with others, that beyond is the place of knowledge perfected.

John: Yes.

Q: In staying there, in a real and not yet fully understood sense in me, it really is the end of this world for me as I know it.

John: Yes.

Q: That ending is happening on different levels. When you were speaking, I could follow, and in some way I would almost follow too far, and there were moments when I fell into a kind of sleep. Do you know what I mean?

John: As you follow in, follow in not without that presence.

Q: Are you saying that when I was following, I wasn’t following with the full presence?

John: (Nods)

Q: Okay.

John: Following in without that presence is like you going to your car for a drive, but forgetting your keys. You can do that, but then you’ll need to go back and collect your keys.

Q: My nervous system is attuned to that presence now, so when it’s not there, something naturally stops and I have to go and collect my keys.

John: Yes. Anything that you have embodied that is key to the beyond, you cannot move without. You can move as a self, you can move in this world, you can move in so many different ways, but you won’t be able to move as what you know is beyond.

Q: When I sleep, I’m not asleep the way I used to be. I wake up laughing as I come back into that presence.

John: Your real and higher mobility isn’t dependent on the condition of your self. It isn’t dependent on the integration of your self, while being it integrates your self. You wake up laughing because, in embodying what you’re of, you’re free of all you’re in. You are simply beyond your self.

Q: So there actually is no work for me to do in this world.

John: Yes.

Q: It’s all done from the beyond whilst I’m in this world.

John: It’s done from within this presence that is absolutely key, key to where you’re going and key to what is coming in, key to functioning as what is coming in.

Q: When I’m fully in this presence and connecting with you, it remains very simple for me. Even though I see so many different things and it’s very beautiful, it stays very simple for me. Is that how it is?

John: Yes.

Q: If I lose that sense of very simple presence, it’s not worth anything for me. That simple presence is really key. John, are we able to travel with you without that simple presence, or when we’re travelling with you, is that because there’s always a little bit of that?

John: When the presence is yours because of what you have embodied, you will travel as you know. You have the mobility. Without that presence you can be taken on a trip, one that you have not yet earned, that you won’t be able to sustain on your own. As you come into that presence, as you travel, you’ll be able to carry some of the weight of what you travel into. Without that presence you cannot carry any weight. All you can be in is knowing and seeing.

Your Relationship with Sexuality is Your Relationship with Power.

Q: A few days ago, I became aware how much energy, how much awareness is going towards sexuality. It touched me deep to see that. Here I come on this border of pulling and wanting. Sometimes I can see very clear, but I also know, I get confused there as well.

John: Your relationship with sexuality is your relationship with power. Your sexuality is something for you to completely be in without a trace of need. And that is you being in your power without using your power. Your relationship with your sexuality shows you your relationship with your power as soon as you’re aware of your sexuality. And, if you’re not completely free of your own power, then while you’re aware of your sexuality, there is either ‘want’ or ‘don’t want’. There is either a need to have or a need to not have, versus being in your sexuality without personal issue, without any want of having or want of not having. Being in your sexuality with your heart being completely at rest. Being in your sexuality without the presence of tension. Where there’s need there’s tension. Your use of power shows up as soon as you’re in your sexuality.

Q: Is this also the source of lots of suffering? It more seems like a war going on in men and women, because of the pain?

John: That’s just a war of need. The struggle is one of power. Where there is no need there’s presence without struggle. Being in the midst of any kind of pull with your heart still, being completely at ease, not striving in need of something, and not striving in need of keeping something out. You’re to completely be in your sexuality and not use it for your self and not keep it out. For your heart to have no momentum concerning sexuality while you’re being in it.

Q: Where is the delight coming from being with someone else?

John: Is that delight based on what you’re feeling or is that delight based on what you know? If the delight is based on what you’re feeling then you’ll use your power to chase and control that feeling. If your delight is based on what you know, then you’ll use your power to be in what you know regardless of what you’re feeling.

Q: It’s just difficult to answer this question. It almost seems like there’s a choice then.

John: There is a choice but it doesn’t exist in your mind. And you cannot use your will to make it. The seed of choice exists in your heart, and that choice takes place either in your heart opening or closing. You cannot do this using your will and using your mind. It’s your openness of heart that determines the flow of your will and the flow of your mind, and when your heart tightens that determines the flow of your will and the flow of your mind. The only real choice that you have is for your whole heart to very gently be or for your heart in some way through effort to not be or to try and be.

When your sexuality comes up, are you very gently content to just be in it or do you have need to do something with it? When your sexuality comes up is there a trace of tightening of ‘I want’ or ‘I don’t want’? Or is there just very gently being in it without any kind of want? As soon as you have want or need in sexuality then sexuality is only an expression of want or need. It can only be an expression of love if you are free of want or need. That for you is an issue of power. Letting your power go and just resting in your power or taking hold of your power and using it to have what you think you need. Let your sexuality come up without you having to do anything with it. Just completely resting in it and using your power to let go of any need. When power is released when you would most want to use it, that is when your heart most opens up.

Q: What is there in this moment of sexual union?

John: That depends entirely on where your heart is. That depends entirely on how deeply your whole heart is at one with what you know. The more that your heart is at one with what you know, the more that you can feel fineness instead of feeling what you like. When your feelings are given over to what you like, then within your feelings you lose fineness. The return of fineness in your feelings is only when your heart is immersed in what it knows. Sexual union is entirely for your being. Sexual union is not for your will being used in the need to feel. That is what separates you from what you are as a being.

Q: Can sexual union be a practice for being?

John: Only if there is a base of being, in which that sexual practice can completely rest. Otherwise the sexual practice may be about being as an idea in your mind while it is really only about your use of will in needing to feel what you want to feel. Honesty can tell the difference and dishonesty will turn it all around until it can have just exactly what it wants.

Q: And how is that with having an experience? Besides wanting to have a feeling I can foresee that? But how is that with an experience, where there is a kind of knowing in that?

John: If your experience is cut short or altered and if there is any disappointment at all, even just a trace, then that is how much you’re not in what you know and you’re in what you want. If there’s any hope – hope shows you how much you’re in what you want instead of what you know. When you’re in what you know, there is just the most gentle ease of being, where hope or disappointment doesn’t exist. Ease of being and what you know – they are the same. Where there is ease of being there cannot be disappointment.

Q: Knowing this place of no wants and no expectations – wanting to be there, it’s a little bit tricky, how I say it but, ‘wanting to be there’ – is that a want or is that an attraction happening, a pull…?

John: There is a pull, but if something separates you from your experience of that pull – are you disappointed? If I were to tell you that in one year you’ll be completely at home – would you be excited? And if I were to tell you in almost one year from now, that it will actually be two years instead of one – would you be disappointed?

Q: Disappointment, ya…

John: Then there’s want and need in the midst of a legitimate and a wonderful pull.

Q: It’s also what it makes it so tricky. It seems so tricky because I know this pull home has everything to do with letting go and with letting go and…

John: Real letting go.

Q: Uh?

John: Real letting go. And not you being tricky in letting go so that you can have what’s real.

Q: It’s almost the want to let go.

John: It is not so tricky. It’s you that’s tricky. It is wonderfully simple. It gets tricky when you get tricky. You are completely home when the experience of home can be given to you in any form and just as easily taken away and you remaining in the same wonderful ease of being where there’s no ripple of either hope or disappointment. You are genuinely at home in either experiencing home or losing that experience. When you’re completely being what you know regardless of your present experience, when you’re being what you know, regardless of what you’re thinking or feeling, then thought and feeling is an expression of being instead of thought and feeling being an expression of want or need.