What this Life is For

Q: What is this sense of energetic transmission that I feel? A month ago I read your little book The Intelligence of Love: Manifesting Your Being In This World and I felt this immense peace and energetic transmission.

John: You are linking up through your own deeper levels to what I come from, what I am, and me.

Q: I sense that this is my true home.

John: When someone outside of your self embodies the same as your being, when you are open in the presence of that, your being responds which gives you a direct experience of what you know the truth of. In that, your being is awakened and moves right up into your body and your self. The reason that you believe it is because of its sublime depth and quality.

Q: What is this immense reality that’s unseen? It’s so immense. Is that who we really are?

John: Yes. But until it’s embodied, you don’t have its powers in your life. It doesn’t come into power without you giving it all of your power. Your being, in this way, is empowered by you, for your being to be in your life.

Q: I need to be honest on all levels for this immensity to move through?

John: From within the deepest outwards, yes.

Q: What a gift that this immensity is! It’s who we really are.

John: What a gift that you experience it; that the truth of it registers within your seen levels; that it is awakened in your body and in your self.

Q: What would put me back to sleep again?

John: By compromising the depth of your most delicate listening within, in the protection of anything of your self, anything that you think you have in your life.

Q: My preferences.

John: They all register as personal sovereignty. If you respond to your awakening by being your awakening, your personal sense of self is no longer sovereign. Your deeper beingness is, right out into your life, at any personal cost, and there you are embodying your being, without which you fool your self.

Q: The body’s just a garment, meaning that it’s just temporary?

John: Yes, but as temporary as it is, there is much more to your body than you’re aware of.

Q: What is the sensing power of the body. It knows everything. What is that about?

John: That’s there because of what you were being in your body while you were in your mother’s body; the resonance of what you are as a being, present in your body.

Q: So there is an intelligence that knows everything in the body actually?

John: That can be used somewhat by your self, but its real use doesn’t come in until what you are as a being has it. The real potential in your self isn’t within the development of your self; the real potential of your self and your body is completely dependent on your being having it all. Your being can’t have anything without you being it. Lovely.

Your being is incorruptible. You can corrupt your body, your self, your personality, your life – even your own heart – but you cannot corrupt your own being. As soon as you are being a little bit different from your own being, you lose access; you can’t get in. So you live separate from it, but as soon as you, awareness, relax, and you’re being the same as your own being, you have beautiful, free-flowing access.

Q: So control, that belief in control is what blocks the flow?

John: Believing illusion. Where you think you have control, you don’t. Where you think you have control, you’re not understanding the real nature of control. For you to have full control is only through your being. You can’t have it in your self, on the terms of your self. That’s an illusion. You can’t have full control within your self without your being having all of that control.

Q: That’s what this life is for. That’s why we are here.

John: Yes, and for no other reason. Any other reason is an illusion. It passes only where you let it go, or when you die.

Q: Only the body dies. I don’t know it completely, but there is a knowing that only the body dies. Nothing else dies.

John: And it invites you in, not for the use of your self, but way, way, in for the use of you, as a being. The more that you deeply open the more that your deeper bodies tell you what the truth is.

Q: Listening, quietly listening inside seemed to be helpful. Is that right?

John: That’s an understatement. Really listening within is it.

When you are really listening within, you’re not listening to thinking and feeling, emotions or will. You’re not listening to your self or your past. You, awareness, are listening to what you know. When you are really listening within, you are being honest to what you know the truth of, not influenced by anything else. And you love really listening within. It returns you to pure you. It returns you to being what you really are. It makes your heart as clean as your being. When you listen to your self to inform you of the nature of reality, you take your self to heart and then you can no longer see. Concerning the nature of reality, you’re blind. As soon as you begin to really listen within, all of the voices of your self have no more say and there your heart is freed of your self, and the streams of your being fill your heart. There, your heart is the same as your being.

Q: And perception changes? Is that what you mean, that I’m blind, because then I’m not grasping onto perception any more?

John: Freeing perception to belong to your being. As your being fills perception you see reality for what it really is. As long as perception belongs to your self, you are blind concerning the nature of reality. As soon as you know through really listening within how blind you are in your self, concerning the nature of reality, you begin to see.

Q: It’s completely different, the actual reality.

John: And you so love that.

Q: Because there’s real love there, the actual love. Thank you.

The Golden Thread of Connectivity

Q: I need to let go of everything to be home, and when I try to hold on to something for my self, then I’m lost.  It’s okay to let go of someone who I’m holding onto because in my self I feel like that’s what I want and need in my heart. They are dear to me but I know in my heart that it’s wrong to hold on. If I try to have my own will and make things happen through my self and for a need in my self, then I’m lost and further from home.

John: It isn’t that it’s wrong, but until you are really of what is deeper than what is seen, even the pure and the lovely in what is seen misleads. When you awaken to unseen levels within, you are in a precarious in-between stage where you’re still functioning in levels that are seen, yet you know that you’re all about what you’ve awakened to. If you’re not established in what is unseen, as you engage strong energies in what is seen, they’ll easily take you away.

Having a bond and falling in love, all of that belongs to your being. Without being established in your being, moving in that bond and moving into a relationship on the basis of that bond and falling in love and having love is like surfing a wave. That wave won’t take you deeper into what you’re in. It takes you to where the wave ends. There isn’t anything wrong with that, but if you ride the wave, if you go with it, it’s going to take you some time again to get back out into the deep, so to speak. In the meantime, you will have gone through a whole cycle that has taken up your time, your energy, your life and a whole sense of importance.

You can be in both at the same time, but if you’re not established in your awakening, the bigger energies within what is seen that you participate in will most likely just occupy you, engage you in another cycle. You can go that cycle. It isn’t wrong. There’s much goodness in it, but the goodness that is really there isn’t going to save you from distraction. You can find goodness in anything that you do because you are there.

The illusion is that finding what you know is goodness in the midst of a particular direction makes that direction right, when that direction is neither right nor wrong. The goodness in any direction tells you about goodness. Instead of linking immediately the goodness to something that you’re doing, to a particular direction in your life, let the goodness come back to you so that you are being the golden thread of connectivity and that that thread isn’t based on anything that you’re doing. It isn’t based on what you can see, even though it does move through everything you can see.

If you’re not awakened, all of this doesn’t mean anything. If you’re not awakened, then you just live your life and you do what you honestly think is best. It’s that honesty that is the beginning of a golden thread. It becomes tied to everything on the surface but there will be a most quiet knowing, within, that that thread really has nothing to do with the surface.

It’s neither true nor untrue to move in a particular direction on the surface. The true has to do with you, the unseen goldenness within, and being that in whatever direction you move on the surface, and that your own golden presence doesn’t make a particular thing to do right.

The true is you, not something that you can do. The first true is you deeply getting what you are, that first has nothing to do with doing. You can’t do it. You can directly be pure you. As you become established in the unseen, the doing has to do with moving that unseen within what is seen.

It’s somewhat like the innocence of a small child. What matters is that magical innocence, not what that child does with its day. There the meaning is easily understood that when you say to that child it doesn’t matter much what you do today, and that child is gone into its innocence, doing whatever. And if that child leaves a little bit of its innocence for the sake of what it’s doing, it’s beginning to be a little bit lost.

Relating to a Woman’s Mystery

Q: I wanted to speak with you about my connection to women in my life. I’m used to ease in different areas in my life and looking back I see that getting in touch with women, meeting women, connecting with women had been hard for me to do even in childhood days.  There was a shift in this a couple of years ago which made me experience my self much more open, which led to a lot of encounters; experiences on my side which were quite hard to digest for me.

John: Referencing your self while you’re close to a woman doesn’t tell you what a woman is. Your self won’t tell you; your self doesn’t help you in this. Referencing your self when you’re close to a woman brings pressure into your self because it isn’t in your self that you know about womanness. It’s in your heart, and not you being in your heart so that you can understand in your self about womanness and how to be with it.

Go to your heart and, while you’re close to a woman, stay in your heart despite any of the vulnerability that you experience in your self. You can be close to a woman while you’re in your self and not in your heart, but it won’t satisfy your heart, and while you’re in your self you won’t be able to be close to a woman’s mystery. It’s only when you are really in your heart that you can be close to a woman’s mystery and that her mystery has access into you, that her mystery is free to do whatever it does to you while you’re in your heart. You’ll not try to understand it; you’ll not try to cope in your self with it. You’re just there, in your heart, at rest, clearly affected by her mystery. In that, you get to know what a woman is.

Q: This sense of disconnection which I have experienced a couple of times is a result of this sort of misalignment or misconception.

John: Yes. You can’t be aligned with her mystery without you being at rest, open and soft in your heart. Her mystery is how her being moves through her humanness. She doesn’t even really get her own mystery but, when you are at rest, open and soft in your heart and a little bit close to her, she gets her mystery because it moves to you. Neither one of you will understand it.

Q: So I’m like a mirror of her to see.

John: It’s a pretty special kind of mirror. It doesn’t just reflect, but it also draws and absorbs. As it does, that deeply opens you to your mystery. When you’re transparent because you’re in your heart, what you really are is present and it registers her mystery. In registering it, it awakens it. In awakening it, it draws it and it absorbs it. A man’s mystery is a little bit further from the surface than a woman’s.

Q: Is there anything that I can do to support this development?

John: Nothing. When you’re in that, that leaves you vulnerable in your self, through your heart, to her mystery and by that your mystery is uncovered.

When you’re close to a woman, don’t try to cope. Don’t try to understand her and don’t at all try to relate to her. You can’t. You can only relate to her if your mystery is moving. It’s only your mystery within, uncovered and moving, that can relate to hers. And without the meeting of mysteries it doesn’t matter how much you think you might understand a woman or how much you think you can relate; you don’t really. Open to that and you are available to meet.

Q: As this sensation of dis-connectivity occurs, it’s already too late?

John: That sensation of being disconnected and separate has nothing to do with what you really are. It’s present there in your nervous system and it isn’t telling you the truth.

Q: So it’s literally nothing.

John: In reality, it’s nothing. In your nervous system it’s really something.

Q: So not coping with her, but how to deal with this situation knowing that this is inside of me and not real?

John: Toward those sensations and that experience, be kindly un-listening.

Q: Un-listening…not listening?

John: No. Un-listening.

Q: What is that?

John: Better than not listening. Un-listening works; not listening doesn’t. Not listening makes you resist, which means you’re listening to it. Inside, this is how you be when you’re close to a woman.

Q: And being close makes being a lot easier for me.

John: In your heart this comes naturally to you. Now you see. If I were your mother now, I would be kissing you all over your face.

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