Transcripts on Relationship

India

Living In The Bond Beneath Divorce

Q: In my last marriage, when I took the decision to divorce my husband I felt it was necessary to do it, but after two years there’s still so much grief and missing of him. It was not a healthy relationship. It was terrible, really – so much anger – but I wonder if the bond was strengthening. Did I give up too early? This comes into my mind again and again, and makes it difficult to be in new relationships.

John: For the next two years, live in your bond with him regardless of the relationship having ended...

Read More »
Canada

How To Be A Good Influence In A Difficult Situation

Q1: I come from the States, and my question is about my connection to our society. I’ve never been political but I feel a sense of connection and therefore would like to be part of moving things in a more positive direction than I see happening politically. It feels hard to address without being angry about what’s going on, yet it doesn’t feel right not to address it.

John: In addressing it, by coming from a place within you that doesn’t relate to lack: relating from a fundamental goodness within...

Read More »
Canada

How Can I Be Of Real Support?

Q: I’ve recently welcomed into my home a family member who is an addict. Normally I’m a fairly balanced person, but now there’s uncertainty about how to manage everything and support her. I feel both resentment and great love. I’m struggling with how to be balanced in my heart amongst all the different responsibilities and give support, without really knowing how. Can you help?

John: Any past investments that you’ve had in hardening or in closing, any excuses that you have for ill-feeling or resentment you don’t need for you to be in your heart toward the other...

Read More »
India

Living and Loving From Your Real Bond … With Everyone

Q: I would like to speak to you about my parents. When I was sixteen my father died, and for the last two years of his life I’d had no contact with him. My parents got divorced when I was fourteen and, because my mother gave me much more ground to stand on, I moved in with her. She had the strong feeling that my father would be a bad influence on me. My parents had a lot of fights before she eventually moved out and I took on her beliefs...

Read More »
Canada

How To Argue Well

Q: I don’t want to stay in my patterned ways of relating, and the best way I know is not to let arguments persist.

John: For arguments to become fewer you would have to learn to argue well. For you to learn to argue well is for you to use everything that you are in support of clarity coming through. In a good argument, no one wins but clarity.

Q: I’ve experienced that. There was no emotion; there was straightness and I was in my feet...

Read More »
Copenhagen

A Real Foundation For Relationship

Q: I’d like you to help me look deeper at a pattern of mine. I keep falling in love with men who seemingly don’t want a committed relationship. I can see the reflection of my own lack of commitment and maybe even lack of loving, yet I do feel that the love is very genuine.  

John: The love for …?

Q: The man, and the love for truth.

John: Leave out the first one! Let your whole life turn into the second one...

Read More »
Bad Meinberg

Bringing New, Deeper Love Into Your Marriage

Quote: Everything that you would learn in your next relationship, pour into this one.

Q: I’ve been in love with my husband for many years and we have two children. For a few months I’ve been in a deep connection and love with another man, and this love feels so deep, peaceful, and easy. I’m seeing how my ability to be in love depends on the qualities in another and wonder if I’m evolved enough to be with someone who’s closed and distant...

Read More »
India

True Relationship and Your Eternal Bonds

Q: I’ve been so touched when you’ve spoken about eternal bonds. Could you could say more about what they are? How can we know them and nurture them?

John: By letting the resonance of a bond be what you’re relating to in meeting anyone, in speaking to anyone, in looking at anyone.

Q: You said if I keep relating to anyone with the past that I have with them, I still can’t see them. I’ve seen how as a child I’ve not trusted someone who hurt me, and created shields that meant I didn’t really trust anybody...

Read More »
Canada

The Golden Thread of Connectivity

Q: I need to let go of everything to be home, and when I try to hold on to something for my self, then I’m lost.  It’s okay to let go of someone who I’m holding onto because in my self I feel like that’s what I want and need in my heart. They are dear to me but I know in my heart that it’s wrong to hold on. If I try to have my own will and make things happen through my self and for a need in my self, then I’m lost and further from home…

Read More »
Elspeet

Relating to a Woman’s Mystery

Q: I wanted to speak with you about my connection to women in my life. I’m used to ease in different areas in my life and looking back I see that getting in touch with women, meeting women, connecting with women had been hard for me to do even in childhood days.  There was a shift in this a couple of years ago which made me experience my self much more open, which led to a lot of encounters; experiences on my side which were quite hard to digest for me…

Read More »