Search
Close this search box.

John de Ruiter Transcripts

Mined from our archive of more than two decades of teachings, JdR Gems is a sparkling collection of conversations with John, mostly not published before and much too good to miss. They range from tiny tips for everyday life to revealing our deepest destiny, and come from recordings made anywhere John has met with us, including international meetings, livestreams, camping trips, social gatherings and the Jewel Café.

Two young people put their questions to John at an open mic:

Q1: What is fear?

John: When you focus on something that’s not nurturing and real inside, then you separate from what’s nurturing and real. As soon as you’re separate from what’s nurturing and real, you’ll fear because the nurture and the real isn’t there, so what you’re left with is lack that’s represented in your emotions.

When you have fear that means that you’ve created some distance from what’s nurtureful inside, such as a restedness, a really quiet okayness, a tenderness. Go away from tenderness inside and you’ll fear. Inside of the tenderness there is no fear. 

Q2: How do I handle my anger?

John: In one way the feeling of anger is really good because it quickly tells you that you’re believing something that’s not true. So as soon as you feel angry, let go of everything that you’re thinking until your heart becomes open and settled again. As soon as your heart is opened and settled again, you’re really there. While you’re angry your heart is closed and hard, and you’re no longer really there in your heart. 

When you’re angry, you’re caught in something that isn’t real. As soon as you’re angry, let go of what you’re thinking and what you’re feeling. As soon as you do, your heart opens again. When your heart is open, instead of being upset, you’ll love.

When you’re angry, what that really means is that you’ve tricked your self.  You’ve tricked your self into believing something that isn’t true and that isn’t real. 

Latest Transcript

Young People Speak With John: On Fear And Anger

April 14, 2023

Two young people put their questions to John at an open mic: Q1: What is fear? John: When you focus on something that’s not nurturing and real inside, then you separate from what’s nurturing and real. As soon as you’re separate from what’s nurturing and real, you’ll fear because the nurture and the real isn’t there, so what you’re...

Browse All Transcripts

  • Editors Picks

  • Location

  • Years

  • Months

  • Topics

Q: I’d like to ask about stress and tension in my daily life, and about relaxation and softening. I get very busy but feel the call towards softening. Listening to your words makes me feel so happy, and that part of me is more connected to softness. How can
Q: John, there’s a supposition that therapy is necessary in order to be free from the stories we use to justify our perceptions and our self-identity. It seems as if you’re saying that merely living by the truth, you see you’ve been dishonest, and that honesty will dissolve all
Q: My mother is very ill. She’s likely to die very soon, and in my self I’m panicking.  John: When she dies, she will be so fine.  Q: In my heart I know everything’s okay, yet I feel very alone with it. John: Then that’s that. What is real
Q: As I study counselling and read various theories on child development, I almost see that nature hardwires the bodymind for survival and it seems that what we really are is so opposite, that from the very beginning, nature is encouraging us to distort, and I wonder why. John: It
Q: Hello, I’ve been dealing with trying to change habits, habits that no longer work for me, you know, being lazy, indolent, stuff like that, and I’m just wondering if you have some advice or instruction on how to drop habits. Thank you. John: Changing a habit is, in
Q: Hi John. My question is, does emotion exist in being or is it a construct of self? John: It doesn’t exist in being. It’s a dense form that offers you more form. Positive emotion very easily has heart in it. Negative emotion has only the experience of your

Get the latest news

Subscribe To Our Newsletter