Awakening

Turning Into The Meaning Of Just One Word

Q: I remember you once speaking to me of the value of just one word and how far it could take me. Would you say more?

John: When you’re really listening and very gentled within, there will always be one word that represents what you are most learning, one word being birthed in you. Then, what is being birthed with that one word is the depth of its meaning. One word slowly turns into a whole universe.

There is a whole gestation period in realizing just one word, in you slowly turning into the meaning of one word...

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Pain & Suffering

Gently Letting In Your Past

Q: Sometimes in my connection with you I hit a wall inside. There’s a sense of something bad in me and I wonder about it. When I was eighteen I had an abortion. I was four months pregnant. After the event, I completely cut off from it and put it behind me. I didn’t want to think about it. I realize that somewhere it’s affected my whole life, that on some level I’ve been punishing myself or haven’t really forgiven myself. I never really got down to feeling it...

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Awakening

What You Truly Are Is Grace

Q: I love the truth of what I am beyond my preferences. I can see my inner face in yours and it’s like being in open sunshine. How can I open more to my shadows – those parts of me that I’ve separated from?

John: By seeing the shadows in others – not seeing such shadows with criticism or judgment, but tenderness seeing them. It is only tenderness that has the honesty to see. If someone else’s shadow can in any tiny little way find the same thing in your self, then the shadows of others, instead of being an attraction for irritation, judgment or criticism, are for you a love reflector...

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Consciousness

What Is Real Love?

Q: What is real love?

John: It is the most wonderful, life-giving and healing energy in the universe. It cannot comprehend frustration. It cannot be bothered or bugged. It cannot be frustrated, because love is not frustration. It cannot be provoked to be anything other than love. It doesn’t try to be itself: it cannot be anything other than itself. It is kindness and tenderness without thought, without willfulness. It does not self-reflect. It does not consider itself. It doesn’t think: it doesn’t need to think; it already is...

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Relationship

Living and Loving From Your Real Bond … With Everyone

Q: I would like to speak to you about my parents. When I was sixteen my father died, and for the last two years of his life I’d had no contact with him. My parents got divorced when I was fourteen and, because my mother gave me much more ground to stand on, I moved in with her. She had the strong feeling that my father would be a bad influence on me. My parents had a lot of fights before she eventually moved out and I took on her beliefs...

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Relationship

How To Argue Well

Q: I don’t want to stay in my patterned ways of relating, and the best way I know is not to let arguments persist.

John: For arguments to become fewer you would have to learn to argue well. For you to learn to argue well is for you to use everything that you are in support of clarity coming through. In a good argument, no one wins but clarity.

Q: I’ve experienced that. There was no emotion; there was straightness and I was in my feet...

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Consciousness

The Echo of Tenderness Into Eternity

Q: I have this question about innocence. All those things that we do to our selves and to other people … do they leave marks? Do they go away?

John: Never. Did you see the movie ‘The Gladiator’? What he said is true: that everything that you do now echoes through eternity.

Q: So you just let it echo?

John: That’s acceptance...

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Sexuality

The Opening of Pure, Clean Sexuality

Q: Sexuality has been a challenge for me my whole life. You have spoken about the fire of sexuality. I know a little of that, but for many years it hasn’t felt like that at all. I’ve experienced reduced potency and this has created disturbances in relationship. Now there is almost no sexuality in my life and I’ve enjoyed not having to worry about it. I don’t feel inclined to be sexual with anyone else, but without moving it in my life, how can I continue to go deeper?..

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Pain & Suffering

How Can I Help Myself During a Panic Attack?

Q: Lately I have been having panic attacks. I’ve had anxieties as long as I can remember and I feel I’ve trained my nervous system this way. I wish I could let go more and relax, like a child in her mother’s arms. Can you help me with what to do when this panic comes up in daily life, when I’m at work or with other people? It scares me.

John: Your nervous system in distress is like your child. As that’s occurring you are like your child’s deeply quieted mother and, as that, your distressed child looks to you and listens to you...

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Relationship

A Real Foundation For Relationship

Q: I’d like you to help me look deeper at a pattern of mine. I keep falling in love with men who seemingly don’t want a committed relationship. I can see the reflection of my own lack of commitment and maybe even lack of loving, yet I do feel that the love is very genuine.  

John: The love for …?

Q: The man, and the love for truth.

John: Leave out the first one! Let your whole life turn into the second one...

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Work

I’m Not Getting The Promotion I Deserve!

Q: My husband and I worked very hard last year and didn’t get promoted. What can we do to have our work recognized? We work very hard, do our duty, but there seems to be no justice.

John: Do what you’re already doing without needing to be promoted. That makes you more promotable than when you need to be promoted. Once you both have what you’re looking for, then what will you do?

Q: I’d continue in the work I’ve chosen, but I am looking for justice and recognition in our workplace...

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Pain & Suffering

Evolving In The Midst Of Bipolar Disorder

Q: For some time now I’ve experienced strong bipolar episodes. I don’t want to be a victim and I do accept responsibility, but their impact is so intense and they throw me so far from my self, I feel that I don’t have my independence anymore. There’s a relentless inevitability and I wonder what to do about it.

John: You suffer from what, in a tropical climate, is called hurricane season.

The seasons that you pass through don’t stop you from being what you first are...

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