Pregnancy And Parenting: Making Your Heart As A Womb

WHEN: February 21, 2015 Afternoon Open Mic

Q: I’m trying to get pregnant and for a few years I’ve been having fertility treatments. It’s not happening, and I wonder how to deal with that. It feels like it’s taken everything from me.

John: It’s taken everything from you because you’re making the prospect of being pregnant mean too much. You’re giving it meaning that it doesn’t have. You’re taking meaning from everything else and giving it to the possibility, the wish, the need and the want of becoming pregnant. So working on becoming pregnant is depleting your self.

Q: I don’t feel I can let go of it. How is it possible to go through this without depleting?

John: By remaining profoundly honest while trying to get pregnant. Then you are honest to something that is more profound than you having a baby. If you’re not honest to what is more profound than having a baby, how are you going to raise this baby? If your way of being matters more to you than becoming pregnant, that way of being will also be how you raise a baby.

If your way of becoming pregnant isn’t the same as your own being, then in trying to become pregnant you are separating from your own being. You’re increasing the distance between your self and your being, and while being less and less like your own being, you’re wanting another being to come into your body and grow.

Your heart needs to become like your womb. When your heart is like your own womb, the tiniest little bit that you know the truth of in your heart will grow in your heart. If you take your self to heart because of being taken by what you want and need, then there’s no room for your being in your heart.

The only way that you can deeply parent is for your heart, in all of your parenting, to be like your womb. That begins before you have your baby, and it needs to flourish in all of your life.

If you love your womb you will make your heart just like your womb … whether you have a baby or not.



Other Popular Talks

Purity Of Heart: At Rest In Love, Within

Q: In your book ‘The Intelligence of Love’ you say enlightenment isn’t everything, purity of heart is. Can you explain that? 

John: You can be enlightened and that doesn’t mean that you’ll be all that you’ve awakened to, all that you’ve come into. It doesn’t really matter how much you directly know, how much you’ve awakened, how much you’ve come into. What really matters is to be what you directly know the truth of within. 

The amount anyone knows is of little consequence...

Read More »

Unconditional Openness: Your Love, Your Freedom

Q: I notice in my intimate, sexual relationships that I can be in a moment of openness, comfort and radiance, and then if I’m spoken to in a way that feels aggressive, unkind or mean I’m very quick to close my heart and my being. I really don’t enjoy that experience. What should I do when my heart feels hurt?

John: Quite simply, at absolutely any cost, don’t close.

Q: How? That feels like the only way to feel safe.

John: You don’t need to feel safe...

Read More »

The Profound Power Of Words

Q: You speak of awareness and knowing as one, and its movement being love. It doesn’t always have to be spoken in words – just being what we know is enough. Yet words are necessary in this world and you speak them so finely.

John: Words spoken from within what you’re coming into initiate profound change. With words, in this, you are packaging the unseen and delivering these packages of being right out into what is seen: the being-power of words.

Q: And it doesn’t really matter if they’re fully heard – just that they’re spoken...

Read More »