CONVERSATIONS WITH JOHN DE RUITER

This site hosts a collection of John de Ruiter’s teachings, many published for the first time and only available here.
The dialogues took place at international events, meetings, open mic and social gatherings, and the College of Integrated Philosophy’s Jewel Café. 

New Releases

Relationship

How Can I Connect With My Family?

Q: My question is about family. How can we be with family in our hearts when we feel very different from them?

John: When you’re in your heart, you’ll see in the others what isn’t different. Your whole sense of meaning in being together will be based on what isn’t different, enabling the differences to have a brightness of color without a sense of polarity. When you’re in your heart toward the others, their differences – how their personalities and selves are different from yours – become dear to you, enabling your love for them to not be based on what they are being to you and how they’re behaving...

Read More »
Parenting

Mothering From Your Unadorned Heart

Q: I would like to deepen the connection between me and my child, and be more aware in it. Can you help me to do that?

John: Be really seen. Reveal your heart and give your heart without embellishment, so that when you’re giving your heart, your heart given is unadorned. Then your child is fully meeting you. Don’t push your way or have your own way. Don’t use any power to have what is personal for you at your child’s expense, and at the same time be kindly strong with what you are clear about...

Read More »
Pain & Suffering

On Primal Fear, Entities And The Price of Real Freedom

Q: In recent weeks I’ve felt very strong survival issues and my survival seems more important than anything else. I feel a very deep, primal fear.

John: Have no issue with it. It’s clear: you are not going to survive. You’re going to die, so until then live from deeply within.

Q: I’ve twice felt I was getting into a story about it. Both times fear of a death so total came super-strongly, and I managed to escape from it.

John: If it is real and true, it’s good and it’s coming – now or later...

Read More »

Editors' Picks

Pain & Suffering

On Primal Fear, Entities And The Price of Real Freedom

Q: In recent weeks I’ve felt very strong survival issues and my survival seems more important than anything else. I feel a very deep, primal fear.

John: Have no issue with it. It’s clear: you are not going to survive. You’re going to die, so until then live from deeply within.

Q: I’ve twice felt I was getting into a story about it. Both times fear of a death so total came super-strongly, and I managed to escape from it.

John: If it is real and true, it’s good and it’s coming – now or later...

Read More »
Awakening

John Speaks Of His Awakening – And The Code To Ours

Q: John, I’m curious about how you were awakened. How did you remember who you are?

John: When I was seventeen, outside of my room at home, I deeply, deeply wondered. I wondered: what is it that is so much more than anything I’ve realized before? What is the deep, deep more? And in deeply wondering, I also simply, deeply, deeply opened, and as I opened I knew. I didn’t understand what I knew, but I really experienced what I knew. I experienced a most nurturing, profound sense of reality as much on the inside as on the outside, it all being, within multiple levels at the same time, all connected...

Read More »
Relationship

Beyond Want And Need: The Fineness of Love In Personal Relationship

Q: I don’t see where personal love – the love from one person to another – fits with the love which just is. Are they related, or is personal love between two people more based on wants, needs and desires? It seems to me that to dwell in the truth I know and to be in relationship must exclude each other. I don’t know your situation, but some teachers seem to be in relationship and others are complete renunciants. I’m in a relationship and feel I might have to give it up for truth...

Read More »