Transcripts From Location: Moen

Feeling & Emotion

Integrating Anger And Reactivity

Q: John, I find I can get really quite angry in social interactions where I feel unfairly treated. It happened recently that I wanted to speak with someone who refused because I was getting angrier. There’s a point at which I close off. I’m wondering whether there’s something I’m missing, or if it’s okay to get angry with others sometimes?

John: For you to be angry in a situation like that exposes that you lack depth in your reasonableness. You’re well acquainted with and value reasonableness, but if you’re pushed to a certain point, you give it up...

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Relationship

How Can I Be With My Angry Father?

Q: A few years ago I decided not to see my father anymore. Sometimes I feel it’s not okay to say “no” to your father, but it has also given me huge peace. I’m scared of getting caught in this father/daughter story again when I go home, but I’ve also realized that I don’t need love from my parents. I don’t know whether to see him now, or not.

John: Whether you see him or not, it needs to be warm. Then not seeing him or seeing him is not because of any kind of issue...

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Consciousness & Awareness

The Key To Your Soul’s Evolution

Q: I feel levels of depth in me. My question is: what is your definition of soul?

John: Remove all of your forms, the seen forms of your self, and there is awareness: you. Remove all of the other forms of your self, all of the unseen forms of your being, all of them perfectly reflecting you. With all of your forms removed, there’s just you: you, meaning; you, meaning aware. And you, meaning aware, are in a point of evolution.

Whatever that point is, is so good...

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Feeling & Emotion

Free Of Fear: Quietly Okay In The Midst Of Life

Q: We’ve been talking a lot about fear, and you said it’s about separation inside. All my life I’ve felt separated from my self, that I should fit in and couldn’t be my self. I feared others, feared that I was not good enough and that I wouldn’t survive. I’ve felt sadness from the beginning. I’ve struggled a lot to find my self and really be me, but fear can still disturb me and take my energy. I want to be free of it and go deeper. 

John: Wherever you have hope or fear, you’re giving your power away...

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Consciousness & Awareness

Warmly At Home In Darkness

Q: About seventeen years ago I was in an accident and I was hospitalized for two years. Two years later I was in another accident and hospitalized for three more years. My mind, body – everything – collapsed and it took me a long time to recover. Three years ago my body collapsed again and I went into a coma. That was the worst: everything went totally black and all the fears and darkness from childhood came up. So much darkness! Why is this process so hard? I don’t understand...

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Health & Illness

The Opportunity In Sickness And Depression

Q: In the last six months I’ve struggled with lots of physical difficulties: pneumonia, a frozen shoulder, and a heavy depression I couldn’t get up from. I want to know what it’s all about.

John: Opportunities for you to be what is just beneath the surface instead of you being the surface: quiet okayness in a frozen shoulder; warmth quietly seeping in, in the midst of depression.

Q: Why do so many people have depression?

John: It doesn’t matter if you’re depressed...

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Relationship

Beyond Patterns and Habits: Being Real In Relationship

Q: I’m so grateful to have met you in Rishikesh. I felt some healing had happened when I stopped my practice of self-enquiry, but now I feel as if my self has come back stronger than before!

John: It’s not stronger; you just didn’t realize how strong it was. When you’re busy with a practice, the strength of your self goes into that practice. 

As you profoundly open, that opens you up to experience your self as it actually is – not as you believed it to be and not as you’ve made it to be...

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Parenting

Nurturing Your Child’s Goldenness

Q: My question is to do with my daughter. Sometimes I think I’m too judgmental and don’t accept her personality. I’m always thinking about what others think of her, wanting her to be a certain way. It’s hard for me to accept that she has her own way and personality. I love her very much but don’t know how to deal with my feelings – or her, sometimes.

John: Everything that you feel about her that is nurturing, every feeling you have for her that touches your heart, say to her without adding anything else to it, so when you start to speak, that’s not a reason for you to say everything else that you think and feel...

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Consciousness & Awareness

Your Genetic Conditioning And You

Q: Does our genetic conditioning strongly influence our life and behaviour? 

John: Where you’re not in your heart, absolutely. Where you are unconditionally in your heart, at any personal expense, no.

Q: Sometimes I think a person’s genetic imprint is what makes it so easy for them. They seem blessed with an open heart and everyone wants to be with them. Others seem to have to dig and dig. They seem to have a strong shadow and it’s not easy for them...

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Feeling & Emotion

Becoming Free Of Judgment

Q: How can I release myself from the judgment of my self and others?

John: For one month, live your life without having any personal opinions. Your judgments come from your opinions. For one month have no opinions about your self, no opinions about others, and during that month live in openness where opinions used to be. Live for one month without any personal opinions and you’ll see how much room there is, within, for you to breathe.  

Q: So for one month, no speaking or thinking about personal opinions?..

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